i'm tired.

i really don't know what i should do anymore.

i'm disheartened.

miserable.

it feels like.

eventually there'll be one day

i'll slowly become transparent.

is this even okay?

에이핑크 - Mr. Chu

한번 보면 두 번 더 보고 싶어 두번 세번 보면 너를 더 안고 싶어너와 커플링 커플링 손에 끼고서 함께 이 길을 걷고 싶어 난


매일 매일 봐도 난 더 좋아져 두번 세번 나의 볼을 꼬집어 봐도마치 dreaming dreaming 꿈을 꾸는 듯 생각만 해도 난 미소가


Mr. Chu~ 입술 위에 Chu~ 달콤하게 Chu~ 온몸에 난 힘이 풀려내 맘 흔들 흔들어 날 흔들어놔요 I’m falling falling for your love


Hey you~ 입술 위에 Chu~ everyday with you~널 보면 내 눈이 감겨몰래 살짝 다가와 또 키스해줄래 내 꿈결 같은 넌 나만의 Mr. Chu~


부드러운 감촉 잊을 수 없어 화끈거리는 내 얼굴 빨개지는 걸It’s so lovely lovely 사랑스러워 난 네가 자꾸만 좋아져


Mr. Chu~ 입술 위에 Chu~ 달콤하게 Chu~ 온몸에 난 힘이 풀려내 맘 흔들 흔들어 날 흔들어놔요 I’m falling falling for your love


Hey you~ 입술 위에 Chu~ everyday with you~널 보면 내 눈이 감겨몰래 살짝 다가와 또 키스해줄래 내 꿈결 같은 넌 나만의


내 소원을 들어줘요 영원한 사랑 이뤄주길짜릿짜릿한 느낌 절대 맘 변하지 않기평생 나만 바라봐줘 baby


Mr. Chu~ 입술 위에 Chu~ 달콤하게 Chu~온몸에 난 힘이 풀려내 맘 흔들 흔들어 날 흔들어놔요 I’m falling falling for your loveHey you~ 입술 위에 Chu~ everyday with you~널 보면 내 눈이 감겨몰래 살짝 다가와 또 키스해줄래 내 꿈결 같은 넌 나만의 Mr. Chu~

TABLO - TOMORROW (ft. Taeyang of BIGBANG)

No, no, no, no more tomorrow.
No, no, no, no more tomorrow.
사랑은 받는다고 갖는 게
시간은 걷는다고 가는 게
사람은 숨 쉰다고 사는 게
아닌데.
Baby there’s no, no tomorrow.
그때 그대로 난 멈춰있고.
마지막 그 순간에 머문 시간.
너에겐 그저 지난날이지만.
Baby there’s no, no, no, no more tomorrow.
Till you come back, everyday is yesterday.
Baby there’s no, no, no, no more tomorrow.
가슴을 찢던 그 기억이 달력을 찢고 한해처럼 저물어가.
너를 잊고 사는 척 하기도 해. 아직도 내 세상은 변함없어.
너만 없어. 사람들은 다, 돌아보면 웃게 되는 거래.
너를 향했던 고개를 틀기도 힘든 내게.
듣기도 싫은데 왜 떠들까? 난 여기서 머문다.
하지마라, 내일은 해가 뜬다는 말.
너와의 밤보다 캄캄한 아침일 테니.
비온 뒤에 땅이 굳는다는 말.
너와의 근심보다 답답한 안심일 테니.
다 엉망이잖아.
너에게는 다시 봄이지만 내 계절은 변하지 않아.
내 마음이 또 싹튼다 해도 I’ve got no tomorrow.
Baby there’s no, no tomorrow.
그때 그대로 난 멈춰있고.
마지막 그 순간에 머문 시간.
너에겐 그저 지난날이지만.
Baby there’s no, no, no, no more tomorrow.
Till you come back, everyday is yesterday.
Baby there’s no, no, no, no more tomorrow.
속은 텅 빈 죽은 미소인데 너를 만날 때보다 좋아 보인대.
이젠 한숨이 놓인대. 난 숨이 조이네.
미소가 나만 못 속이네.
평범해지긴 했어. 마음이 짐이 돼서 많이 비워냈어.
정말 미치겠어.
내겐 들리지 않는 위로들 제발 그만해.
사랑은 다른 사랑으로 잊는다는 말.
나에겐 이별보다 쓸쓸한 만남일 테니.
시간이 다 해결해준다는 말.
나에겐 매순간이 죽은듯한 삶일 테니.
그래, 사랑이란 건 받는다고 갖는 게…
시간이란 건 걷는다고 가는 게…
사람은 숨을 쉰다고 사는 게 아닌 걸 이젠 아는데.
No, no more tomorrow.
No, no more tomorrow.
네가 돌아올 때까진.
No, no, no more tomorrow.
내게 돌아올 때까진.
No, no, no more tomorrow.
Baby there’s no, no tomorrow.
그때 그대로 난 멈춰있고.
마지막 그 순간에 머문 시간.
너에겐 그저 지난날이지만.
Baby there’s no, no, no, no more tomorrow.
Till you come back, everyday is yesterday.
Baby there’s no, no, no, no more tomorrow.
Till you come back to me.
Baby there’s no, no, no, no more tomorrow.
Till you come back, everyday is yesterday.
Baby there’s no, no, no, no more tomorrow.

I've been a really insensitive person the past few days.

Feeding off all my own negativity.

Adding more stress to you.

Damn.

I haven't been behaving like I said I would.

absence makes the heart fonder.

yes.

i do agree with that.

you'll start missing that special person.

start wondering what they're up to.

sometimes you may just end up over thinking.

you'll try to not think about them.

telling yourself that they're busy.

and you shouldn't try to inconvenient them during busy times.

but.

it'll have the reverse effect.

the more you try to not think about them.

the more you think about them.

but i do believe.

having some time away from each other.

having some personal space to do whatever we want.

within that time frame.

you'll start to appreciate both the good times and the bad times together.

you'll start to think about what's missing out in the rs.

it'll probably strengthen the bonds within two people.

or it might just break the bond.

depending on how the individuals view it.

i believe there's more good times to come!

i'm still missing you baby.

결국 Without You

Love is painful all the love is painful

바보처럼 반복 That’s what I always do

But pain is beautiful It’s same as you

희망은 실망으로 소망은 절망으로

사랑이 깊어질수록 아픔은 deep해 더

이번엔 다를 거란 착각 혹은 기대 uh

결국.. 몇 년이 지났을까 영원이란 건 없다

결국.. 인연이 아닌 걸까 다시 혼자가 되다

겨우.. 겨우.. 겨우.. 진짜 사랑을 찾은 줄 알다가

결국.. 또 결국.. 이렇게 끝나버린다

내 마음은 처음부터 그대로인데 상처로 가득해 이젠 그대로 인해

점점 변해가 차가운 네 목소리에 나도 식어가고

멀어지는 우리 사이 되돌리기엔 아무 감정 없이 서로를 맴돌기엔

힘에 겨워 나 이별을 선물하고 돌아서 I’m fallin’ without you

결국.. 누구의 잘못일까 사랑이란 건 없다

결국.. 이별이 지는 걸까 지쳐 나 잠이 들다

겨우.. 겨우.. 겨우..여기까지가 마지막인지 우린

결국.. 또 결국.. 또 다시 남이 되나

내 마음은 처음부터 그대로인데 상처로 가득해 이젠 그대로 인해

점점 변해가 차가운 네 목소리에 나도 식어가고

멀어지는 우리 사이 되돌리기엔 아무 감정 없이 서로를 맴돌기엔

힘에 겨워 나 이별을 선물하고 돌아서 I’m fallin’ without you

ye I’m fallin’ without you hey..

Let’s go

처음에는 몰랐겠지 그녀의 빈 자리가 좋았겠지

하루 이틀 모레 지나 보낸 뒤에서야 비로소 그녀가 고맙겠지

몰랐겠지 네 자신에 대해 너 없이 잘 살 수 있다던 그 확신에 대해

오늘과 다른 내일 벌써 1, 2년 이 시련만큼 늘어나는 미련

시간이 지나면 달라지길 기도해

For you my baby

내 마음은 처음부터 그대로인데 상처로 가득해 이젠 그대로 인해

점점 변해가 차가운 네 목소리에 나도 식어가고

멀어지는 우리 사이 되돌리기엔 아무 감정 없이 서로를 맴돌기엔

힘에 겨워 나 이별을 선물하고 돌아서 I’m fallin’ without you

ye I’m fallin’ without you..

Good things will come when you wait for it.

that's what i believe in.

somehow.

I've gotten more patient.

but that doesn't mean I don't care.

it doesn't mean that if I don't show it.

if I don't ask.

it'll mean that I don't care.

cause deep down.

I'll still be wondering and being concerned.

i miss you.

i realized.

i'm so lost.

i'm so heartbroken.

i'm so confused.

i realized.

i've been crying the past 3 nights.

i've become so tired.

i've nobody else to talk to about important stuff except you.

i realized.

you've probably been suffocating.

you've probably wanted more space.

you've probably changed your mindset about stuff.

you're so important to me.

but...

how strong-willed a person is.

how much of a fighter a person is.

they'll eventually get tired one day.

why?

because we're all humans.

that's why.

treasure the people around you before they're gone.

it's sad when people you know.

become the people you knew.

is that the reason why i always feel so empty?

so hollow inside.

like things are missing.

This doggie is just too cute!

Damn do I love that expression on his face!

Priceless.

And that cute little arms.

How often does an average person dream?

I do wonder.

So I've looked up and it says about 3 to 5 times a day.

That's quite a bit.

In this case I'm not an average person.

NOOOOOOOOOOO. 

Cause I hardly dream.

Not even daydream in the day or something!

Hahaha.

Some dreams can be really vivid.

And you'll just wake up feeling that you're still in it.

Until you got snapped out of it.

You'll be like "awww man I thought it was for real"

I had that experience before.

When I dreamt about my dead uncle sitting in the living room, waving to me, and I woke up with tears in my eyes and crying and I even had to confirm with mom about it.

It's super drama I know.

But for a moment I thought it was real and that my uncle wasn't dead.

Or probably I did not want to come to terms with that, that even my brain feels like he's still alive somewhere.

And if a vivid dream were to come true, it'll just feel like dejavu.

Like wow.

That's damn cool.

"I can predict the future" that sort of line. HAHAHA.

Some dreams are like some meshed up fantasy.

HAVENT ANYONE DREAMT OF UNICORNS OR DINOSAURS OR FLYING CARPETS OR FLESH EATING RABBITS.

ALL IN ONE. OR SOME OTHER THING LIKE THAT.

LOL.

But it's pretty awesome dreaming about things that're not real.

You can have all the freedom you want to dream about those and you know that it'll  never ever happen in real life.

If it did.

Sh*t just got real man.

HAHAHAHA.

Some dreams would just leave you wanting more.

Makes you want to find out what happen in the end.

Makes you want to go back and dream the same dream just to get to the ending.

That sounds like one of the plot in Harry Potter.

BUT. You'll somehow never get to the end.

And it's not every time you have dreams that repeat itself.

It gives me the feeling that.

Probably our subconscious-ness wants us to figure it out ourselves.

Like... you have control of what you can dream and what will happen in your future.

You don't just let something else take the lead and guide you to the end.

You hold responsibility for your own life.

THAT SORT OF FEEL.

Ever heard, that if you dream about something, it'll not come true.

There're some who believe it does.

BUT.

It's really up to the person to make it come true or to not let it happen.

I mean it's like a choice thing.

If it happens, what're you gonna do, how're gonna make the best out of it.

If it doesn't happen, what will you do about it, will it be good if it really did happen.

Blah.

I don't know why.

Deep within me, I believe that if you dream, it'll not happen.

Soooo contradicting!

Currently hook onto this song!

It's been a month and I'm still on it.

I don't know why.

But YES.

I love this song man.

so... now that i'm back.

let's start with some boring topics.

like.. 

LIFE.

often do we hear people say.

life is like a roller coaster ride.

one moment you're high and one moment you're low.

it's not always smooth sailing and i knew it.

i learnt that since young.

there's a lot of setbacks.

but it's us to decide whether we want to pick ourselves up and move on.

or to dwell on it and fall to the pits.

so yeah.

there's been a lot that's going on in my life now.

it's probably the turning point.

i just hope that everything changes for the better.

but well..

the future is unpredictable.

i got hit real hard in the face yesterday with my exam results.

accompanied with things that's going on.

i started thinking how tired i was.

how everything is tiring me out.

how everything i wanted eventually break.

and i don't want to care about anything anymore.

yes.

total negativity.

i guess that's normal for any normal people right?

i'm really grateful.

to have that special someone there for me.

after talking and crying out.

i realized how much i've changed.

my mindset especially.

it's time for me to find back myself

and my positivity! :D

gonna start blogging again!